Today is Thursday, March 11, 2010. It is the 70th day of the year with 295 days to go.
Today’s History
In 1861, the Constitution of the Confederate States of America was adopted during a convention in Montgomery, Alabama.
In 2004, 10 bombs exploded on a commuter rail in a Al-Qaeda terrorist attack in Madrid, Spain.
Today’s News
Second Life, Real Life
A South Korean couple has been arrested after they allegedly let their real toddler starve to death while they raised a fake child online. According to reports, the couple would feed their real kid only once a day while they sat for hours in an internet café where they played a fantasy role playing game. The game involves raising a child with mysterious powers whose skills increase as the game continues. The father stated that he wished his real child had not gotten sick, but she “will live well in heaven forever.” The couple had lost their job and the real child was born prematurely. They used the online game to escape reality.
I guess they are going to be even more stressed out when they go to jail. Who’s going to raise the fake internet child? These people can let a real baby starve while they sit around in an internet café all day long playing with a fake baby, but when people start suggesting that people should have a license to procreate, everyone gets all upset.
Milk’s Away!
A Kentucky woman who was already in jail for public intoxication is now being charged with third degree assault on a police officer after she squirted a prison guard with breast milk. The woman had just undergone a search before she entered the prison and was changing into a prison uniform. The woman and guard got into an altercation so the woman squirted her in the face with breast milk.
I’m a little bit confused by this. The woman had just been searched and now she is changing into a prison uniform. Why is the guard standing so close to her? Unless this woman has some kind of super extra high speed mammary glands and she can squirt milk 10 feet across a room, I don’t understand how this could have happened. Since boobs are down here and the guard’s face is up there, it just seems a little farfetched to me. I wish these news stories would explain things a little more. I want to see the police report.
If It Didn’t Work Before…
…it probably won’t work this time. An Alaskan woman is under arrest for once again trying to steal a TV and escaping in a cab. The woman was arrested last year after she walked out of Sam’s Club without paying for several TVs worth $6,000. She hailed a cab outside the store and tried to get away, but was stopped and arrested. The woman finally posted bail for that incident last Friday, and today she has been arrested again for doing the same thing. She went into a Fred Meyer store, snatched a TV and then went outside to get a cab, but was once again caught.
So you realize that your method is not working, right? Maybe you should try something else. But seriously, how did she even make it out of Sam’s Club in the first place? You know any time you try to leave any Wal-Mart/Sam’s Club, some grandpa is waiting at the door trying to check your receipt. Sometimes they let you slide, but if someone strolls up with eight TVs in their cart, you can best believe that grandpa is waiting for you with his little pink highlighter.
The Saviour
A 7 year old California boy is responsible for saving his family’s life. When three gunmen broke into his family’s home, the little boy and his six year old sister hid in a locked bathroom with a cell phone. The intruders held the parents at gun point and threatened to steal whatever they wanted from the home. The boy called 911 and told the operator, “There’s some guy who’s going to kill my mom and dad. Bring cops. A lot of them! And soldiers, too.” The gunmen broke into the bathroom and took the phone away from the child. Then he told them that he had called 911. Upon hearing that, the suspects fled the home without harming anybody or taking anything. The men are still on the loose.
Good job, kid! Even though he was scared, he knew exactly what to do: hide somewhere and call 911. Parents of small children should start teaching them very early how to call 911 in case something happens. Some people don’t want to expose their children to the negative violence of life and you would hope that your home is never invaded, but it could also be for medical reasons. There are plenty of stores of small kids calling 911 after a family member has had a heart attack or has become somehow incapacitated.
Doesn’t Pay Like It Used To
The economy is so bad that even the criminals are taking a pay cut. California police are searching for a woman who robbed 11 customers at a supermarket Wednesday night. The woman was armed with a semi-automatic pistol and confronted several customers inside the store, demanding money from them. She got what she could from them and then robbed another customer who was on his way into the store. The woman fled with a grand total of $6. No one was hurt in the incident.
Six whole dollars? And what is so pathetic is that if she had been caught, she would have done time for armed robbery for six measly dollars. You can barely buy a value meal at McDonald’s with $6. That’s not enough money to put gas in the getaway car. Sad.
In the House of the Lord
Iowa police have arrested a man on second degree burglary charges after he broke into a church and used the equipment to watch porn. A member of the church caught the man trying to haul away a garbage can full of food, kitchen utensils, clothes, electronics and a large flat screen television. The man stated that he watched porn, scavenged the place, then slept in the basement. He was trying to sneak away the following morning when he was caught.
What kind of loser breaks into a church to watch porn? Can’t you do that at home? It’s a little bit bizarre because the article doesn’t say where he got the porn from. Was the porn already in the church? Did he bring the porn with him? If he brought it with him, I need to understand why he felt that a church would be the best place for his activities. And then on top of that, he spent the night and robbed the place. I mean, really. The church is a sanctuary, but let’s not get overboard.
Take the Keys, Kid, Mommy’s Had Too Much
Remember the first time you got to get behind the wheel of a car? Some of us didn’t have to wait until 16. Maybe your dad let you drive around the Wal-Mart parking lot when you were 15, maybe even 14. I’m pretty sure that sneaky little driving lesson didn’t involve your mother or father being so completely trashed that you were the trusted individual to drive. A Nebraska woman is under arrest for three counts of child neglect after she allowed her 14 year old son to drive the family home when she became too intoxicated to drive. Deputies spotted the family van swerving all over the street. When they stopped the vehicle, they discovered a 14 year old kid in the driver seat. His mother was in the passenger seat, completed toasted, while two other kids age 14 and 17 were in the back. The children have been removed from the home.
Seriously? Okay, what’s wrong with this article? Why isn’t the 17 year old driving? I hate these articles don’t tell the whole story. Just because you’re 17 doesn’t mean you have a license but I think you might be a better candidate for designated driver than a 14 year old, unless the 17 year old was blind or had Down’s Syndrome. Clearly the mother was that sauced she couldn’t even make THAT decision. Nice. Mother of the year, right there, folks.
Today’s Thought
Real success is finding your lifework in the work that you love. –Dave McCullough
