Today is Tuesday, April 27, 2010. It is the 117th day of the year with 248 days to go.
In 1810, Ludwig von Beethoven wrote Für Elise.
In 2009, a Mexico City toddler was the first swine flu death on American soil.
A Connecticut woman has been arrested on six counts of misuse of the 911 system after she called 911 several times to request a ride home from a club. The woman was apparently intoxicated and was concerned about driving drunk, so she continued to dial 911 until a police officer did arrive to give her a ride—to jail.
After all the stories I’ve printed about people misusing 911, why do people persist? Just in case you didn’t know the 911 system is not a cab service. They are able to give you a ride, but not to the place you want.
No Good Deed Goes Unpunished
An NYC homeless man trying to help save someone else’s life was left to die in the middle of the street. According to the investigation, the homeless man saw a woman being attacked by her boyfriend and went to help her. He was stabbed several times during the altercation. The couple ran away when someone else called 911 at 6AM to report the incident but when police arrived they could not find anyone. Police think the wrong address was given. The man lay dying in the street for another hour with several people walking past his body without doing anything. Surveillance cameras in the area showed several people simply walking past the man, or stopping to stare at him. One person even stopped and lifted up the body to see the pool of blood beneath the man. That person then walked away. Someone called 911 at 7AM but again the wrong address was given. Thirty minutes later, another 911 call came in and this time police were able to find him but the man was already dead.
That’s really sad. I hope I never need help from anybody. I don’t want to be lying in the street, bleeding to death and people just randomly walk past me like I’m a part of the sidewalk. The residents in the neighbourhood say it’s not unusual to see people sleeping in the street and others say it’s not their job to determine whether someone needs help or if they’re just trashed. No, it’s not your job, but everybody wants to live decently. Whether the guy was drunk or dead, do you really want him lying there in front of your home or business? People just don’t care anymore, but then again, you don’t want to get involved because you don’t want anybody to come after you. That’s why I’m moving to Antarctica.
Potential candidates for the police or military in Indonesia will not be able to join if they have had a penis enlargement. Anybody already in the police or military will be discharged if they decide to get a penis enlargement. In addition to the hundreds of other questions asked on a military and police application, candidates will also be asked if their “vital organ has been enlarged.” A police chief stated that men who’ve had an enlargement will be declared unfit for duty because such unnatural sizes are a hindrance during training activities. According to information, penis enlargement is popular in this area of the world where men often wear additional appendages to appear larger. Other men use a different technique which involves wrapping the penis in a leaf called gatal-gatal, which strangely means “itchy,” so that the penis will swell up and appear larger.
There are so many things I could say about this, but I’ll refrain from doing so because I could probably go on for days. Seriously, though, are some men that insecure that they would go to such lengths (I guess the pun is intended) by wrapping their special parts in a leaf that makes them itchy and swollen? That can’t be safe. Even if it does get bigger, is still functional? My guess is that it would be all irritated and you’d spend a lot of time scratching and adjusting. I want to say something else, but I’m just going to let it go. But I do wonder how large these penises get that they are a “hindrance” to training. What sort of training activities do they do in their military that requires a smaller penis? Okay, I’m done.
Ooops, My Bad
Colorado police are looking for a man who broke into a family home in the middle of the night, then left without taking anything. The couple in the home stated that a man entered their bedroom at 3 in the morning and waved a gun in their face. He informed them that he was there to rob them and then he said, “Oh, I’m in the wrong house. I’m sorry.” The man reportedly left after that without injuring anyone or taking any items.
Okay, well, first, can you please make sure you have the right address before you attempt to rob someone? Secondly, if you’re going to go through all that trouble and even if you did get the wrong house, why not just rob them anyway? I wonder if he intended to rob the house next door or just across the street. The police don’t say if there were any other break-ins on the block. He might have been a drunk. People are so strange.
Be Glad You’re American
Aren’t you glad that you’re an American and you can do things like go to the movies or the circus, and have gold teeth? And we’re not just talking about limitations on women’s movements, but la-dee-da-dee everybody. The people of Turkmenistan are once again glad they’re Turkmen because the ban on the circus has been lifted. The previous president who was in charge for 21 years banned the circus, the movie theatre, opera, the ballet, lip-syncing and gold teeth because these were all seen as “alien.” The new president has lifted the bans on these activities, however, ballet is still a no-go. Hundreds of children lined up to see the circus for the first time ever this past weekend. Before the ban was lifted, the only movie theatres were banquet halls with a large old school television and a DVD player. Viewers got to vote on the limited movie selection from the local video store.
Not even Blu-Ray? America ain’t perfect, but why you would want to live anywhere else is beyond me.
For those who do not think, it is best at least to rearrange their prejudices once in a while. –Luther Burbank