Daily News April 13

Nappy-Headed Hoes

I’m sure you’ve heard the buzz:  Don Imus has been fired after referring to the women’s basketball team at Rutgers as “nappy-headed hoes.” 

This is going to be controversial but I think I have to play devil’s advocate on this one.  Before this mess all started, I never even heard of Don Imus, but I see him as some right-wing country white guy who probably is racist, but who really knows these days?

So, naturally, the black community got all up in arms about this white man and how dare he call our beautiful black women “nappy-headed hoes!!”  We should burn him at the stake, that cracker!!

Okay, why are we mad again?  Because he called these women nappy-headed or because he called them hoes?

Why are we getting mad when we do it ourselves? Black people degrade each other more than any white person could.  We do it all the time.  “Wassup my nigga….”  “Man, fuck that bitch…”  “Yo, dawg, what’s up?”

I sit and listen to black people say similar things to each other like this all day long.  To my credit, I don’t use the words “nigga” or “dawg/dog” because I think they are ignorant.  I don’t want a white person calling me a nigger and I damn sure don’t want no black person calling me one.  I’m not a dog, or even resemble one so why would I want to be called such?  I don’t care if it’s slang, or what’s popular, it sounds stupid.

And then black people get MAD if a white person says what his black brother says to him all day.  I think that is hypocrisy. 

What I am about to say is very general and does not describe THE ENTIRE RACE, so relax if it dosn’t apply to you.

I think white people laugh at us inwardly when we slap each other on the back, give each other some dap and call each other nigger, nigga, whatever… One guy (a black guy) described it to me as something social.  “It’s cool cuz he’s black too.”  Why?  If it offends you so much, you shouldn’t say it at all or allow ANYONE to say it to you.

When my brother starts up in his slangy-slang, I always tell him, “Don’t call me dawg.  I’m your sister.”

Unfortunately, I do refer to other females as bitches, black and white.  That’s my admisison of shame, and so this lecture is directed at myself as well. 

I saw on CNN today the hypocrisy of the black community because we will get pissed if a white man calls our sisters hoes, but yet every rapper in America has got up on a music video and talked about “hoes,” “bitches,” and “tip drills.”  And we dumb ass women are in the club shaking our asses to it every Friday night, myself included, but yet I will be pissed beyond belief if a man called me a hoe.

Why this double standard? 

Why can we sit down and listen to Nelly say, “It must be your ass, cuz it ain’t your face” and watch this video of FACELESS black women with their legs spread, booties shaking and then be at work the next day, “Girl, did you see the new Nelly video, he is so cute!”  What self-respecting woman can actually sit in her house on any given day and have Ying Yang Twins blaring.  Does anybody ever really sit down and listen, LISTEN, to the lyrics of the shit they are listening? 

I was never really a big fan of rap music.  I don’t own any rap CDs, and when I download music I only download the hit song that’s in the club.  I can’t sit in the car and listen to it, unless I’m on my way to the club to be a hypocrite like everyone else.  I think there’s a time and a place for everything.  I guess that type of music is acceptable for the atmosphere, but I can’t see me actually endorsing some of the shit I hear.  Under NO circumstance can I sit and watch the videos to these songs.

I haven’t seen a music video in I don’t know how long.  If I happen to be somewhere when they’re on TV, if it’s too trashy, I don’t watch.  I can’t see how a woman can sit down at her TV watch another woman upended, ass all hanging out and be like, “I like that song.”

What kind of twisted world is this?  I think we just get complacent and we end up not knowing what we really want.  I don’t think we should get mad at the Don Imuses of the world if he calls us nappy-headed hoes, because we don’t get mad when Lil’ Jon calls us a hoe and we actually “shake our tailfeathers” when we are commanded to.  When white people call us niggers, don’t get mad because he’s only repeating what he hears us say to each other on a daily basis.  What is the difference?

If you don’t respect yourself, who else will?  Portray yourself as you wish to be recieved.   If black men and women take the time to clean house within their own community, maybe then we will get the respect we deserve.  Right now we are in no position to demand anything as long as we treat each other like the “dogs” we constantly call each other.

And you know what is so sad about all of this, someone is going to read this and then actually sit down and try to rationalise an excuse as to why this is okay. 

You’re doing it already.

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