Myrtle Beach: A Drama in Five Parts, Part IV

Before I went on this trip, someone told me that I should not go down there with a stank ass attitude. A friend of mine was like, “Don’t go down there, dressing skanky and getting mad because guys is grabbing on your ass.” When it comes to boys I do have a real stank attitude because I don’t like guys grabbing on me, and I’m very selective about the way boys approach me. Don’t holla at me, don’t say, “Hey girl, nice titties!” shit like that. My friend was like, “Maybe you shouldn’t go, because I know how you are.”

But when we got there, it was very chill so I was wondering why he said that. Near our hotel, everyone seemed real laid back.  Yeah, guys was trying to holla, but they weren’t being too ridiculous.  Guys are just guys sometimes and you just have to take them for what they are.  Most of them don’t have the sense God gave them.  I mean, for real, I would think a guy would understand that if he wanted to holla at a chick he might be more respectful, and he would get a lot more girls.  But then on the other hand, some chicks like it when dudes disrespect them.  At any rate, I am getting WAY off topic.

I did get someone to call me Big Titty Red.  I was wearing this red tube top and some guy just rode past like, “Big Titty Red!”

Why when we decide to drive down the strip, I finally understood what my friend went. NIGGAS WAS FIENDING! It was so crazy. It was just dudes walking up and down the street, sittin’ on bikes, sittin’ on nice ass cars with nice rims. I like to look at southern boys! Then the girls, those ghetto ass down south bitches. I took pictures of bad hairdos, skanky sluts in fishnets, booty shorts, thongs underneath skirts, cellulite ass cheeks, skanky hoes with their babies. We seen a chick with a Skittles wrapper glued to her hair.  It was so funny.

We had such a good time on the street because my sister and Shannon were completely drunk and they did not give a fuck what they were saying. My sister said to this hot boy, “Excuse me. Excuse me. Come here real quick, you have something on the back of your head, let me get it.” When the boy came up and turned around, she grabbed his ass and started squeezing, “Okay, you can leave now.” They were straight pimping these guys the way they have done to women for years. It was funny.

When we were taking pictures of hot boys, all the ugly guys were like, “what about me!” Some fat guy was like, “Fat boys need love too!” Then all the clown bama-ass niggas tryin’ to holla. These two clowns came up to us talking about they were apart of Crime Mob, yeah right, how about Clown Mob.

We saw some skanky chick dressed in this skin tight blue fishnet body suit that had these big ass holes in the side from the top to the bottom.  My sister yells out the window, “Hey, there go Beyonce!”

Yeah, if you can’t tell, she is a nut.  But that was the big joke of the whole trip, every time we would see someone, especially a clown we would act like he was some celebrity.  “Hey, ain’t you one of the boys from Pretty Ricky?”  “Oh, there go the Pussycat Dolls!”  “Oh, my God, it’s Ciara.”  Shannon’s thing was, “America’s next top models.”

It took us a mad long time to ride the strip, but that is the point.  Everyone is driving like 3 miles an hour because you want to see and be seen.  Every time we would stop, we would have conversations with whomever was standing there.  Guys was trying to get in the car with us, videotaping us.  Shannon was doing things with her tongue for the camera.  Okay, I was too, so I’ll probably on somebody’s Youtube, but that is the point of the whole thing.  I had a good time on the strip.

Supposedly while we were on the strip there were gunshots. We don’t think it was really gunshots. I have fired off guns and heard gunshots from a distance before so I definitely know what a gunshot sounds like, and that shit was so quiet. It sounded like fireworks or those pop rock things that you throw on the ground to make some noise, but people started running and the cops flew down there, and EMTs and an ambulance. According to someone else, someone got shot, but whatever, nobody was even worried about that.  It’s always the black people.  Get a few people together and people start acting crazy. 

I did see a few fights and would be fights.  Okay, ladies, if you dress like a skanky piece of trash you are going to get guys who treat you like a skanky piece of trash.  This girl was wearing some type of skin-tight Spandex outfit and this guy came by and straight grabbed her ass and she turned around to try and punch him but this other guy pushed her away.

Then we saw guys throwin’ up gang signs and stuff.  This one crew tried to jump in the car of another crew, but there was so many cops they just made everyone keep it moving.

The first night after riding the strip, we didn’t get home until 5 in the morning. The next day we did it again in the afternoon. It wasn’t as fun as when we did it at night, but still, that was the best part of the whole trip to me. Just trippin on the strip.

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