Daily News September 28

Chocolate and Marijuana

The Feds raided a factory in San Francisco that was making marijuana-laced candy and other items that included BBQ sauce with pot in it. Three people were arrested after a 2 year investigation on the place.

As you may or may not know, medicinal marijuana is legal in several states, including California, but the federal government refuses to honour the state laws, citing that pot is illegal no matter who uses it or how it is used.

They found 460 marijuana plants and candy bars, cookies, marshmallow pies, ice cream, peanut butter, jelly energy drinks and Rice Krispy treats all filled with marijuana. Some of the candies were named “Buddafinga,” “Babyjane,” “Mr. Greenbud,” “Stoney Rancher,” and “Rasta Reese.”

According to the feds, candy with marijuana in it is much stronger than just smoking pot, and they want to get this stuff off the street as soon as possible.

A Chimpanzee Is Not a Person
In Austria, a court has ruled that a chimpanzee is not a person. The chimp, which has a name Matthew Pan, was smuggled into the country in 1982 to be used as lab experiments. The authorities found out what was happening and rescued the chimp and sent him to a shelter.

Recently the shelter is filing bankruptcy and animal rights activists are trying to make sure Matthew the Chimp and other animals don’t wind up homeless or being shipped to some country where animal rights laws are not as strict as in Austria. To take care of the chimp, it costs about $6800 a month and donors have made donations but under Austrian law, only a person can accept gifts.

So the animal rights activists are trying to get Matthew ruled as a person so a legal guardian can be appointed to him to accept the gifts. President of the animal rights group, Martin Balluh said, “It is astounding how all the courts try to evade the question of personhood of a chimp as much as they can.”

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Okay, what the fuck? I don’t even know where to begin with this one. This man actually said, “It is astounding how all the courts try to evade the question of personhood of a chimp as much as they can.” No shit! A chimpanzee is an ANIMAL not a person! Of course the courts are trying to evade the question because it’s a stupid question to pose in the first place.

Look, I don’t believe in cruelty to animals. I read about all kinds of sick stories about people setting cats on fire, dog fighting, crazy shit with animals. That is sick and those offenders should be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law; however, I am a meat-eater, I wear fur and leather and enjoy every minute of it. These animal rights activists who take things to the next level, they are just ridiculous to me.

I cannot believe they are spending money on legal representation for a MONKEY! If they want to save Matthew the Chimpanzee, why doesn’t someone just adopt it as a pet and then that person receives the donations from people? I don’t know what kind of laws Austria has about exotic animals for pets, but trying to get the court system to approve a chimpanzee as a person is too ridiculous to be believed.

Kiss of Death
A Chinese woman has been sentenced to death for killing her lover. That in itself is not so weird; unfortunately, a lot of people kill other people. But this woman, she killed her lover by kissing him, a rat poison laced kiss. As she kissed him, she passed a poison filled capsule from his mouth to hers. The lover swallowed the capsule and died right afterwards.

According to the woman, she and her lover had made a promise to each other, that if either one cheated, he or she would have to die. The woman said she saw him talking to another woman and decided that he was cheating, and that he had to die.

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Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. That age old adage is an apt description for this particular story. Okay, guys, when you date a crazy woman crazy things will happen to you. Everybody cheats, yeah, I know, but if you aren’t smart enough to hide what you are doing, you’d better just stop or you are going to wind up like this man with a piece of rat poison in your mouth.

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