It has been a very random past couple of weeks. I cannot believe that March has already come and gone. Why does it seem like the beginning of the year goes by so quickly? The first four or five months will whizz by, but the latter part of the year seems to stagnate. I guess it has to do with the perception of time.
March has been a very interesting month. I was just getting my mind wrapped around the fact that I would be sent on an exotic mission to Omicron Persei 8 when I received an email from Starfleet Command rescinding our orders. I had mixed feelings about the whole thing in the first place. On one hand, I am really not interested in fighting somebody else’s war. I know what raising my right hand to the military means, and I will do my duty to the fullest, but I had ulterior motives that didn’t involve being exiled to locations unknown. I also did not want to leave behind family and friends, to be stuck on foreign soil where I can’t even get egg foo young. But then, I was eager to go because of the experience I would be afforded. I would be in a foreign land, the birthplace of civilisation. I would also be fulfilling family honour and tradition. Believe it or not, that sort of thing is important to me. I guess that’s the Klingon side of me that recognises such lofty feelings as loyalty and courage, everything the Army espouses. I think I would feel greatly ashamed if I manage to make it through my entire Army commitment without being deployed once while other people have gone two and three times.
When they told us we weren’t going, it seemed a little bit anti-climactic. It’s like, “Okay, now what?” And nobody really seems to have a clue. Most of our training was cancelled, but I was still forced to attend one class. I was off my regular job so I could stand around in the hot glaring sun for a week with my least favourite person in the entire universe. I do realise that 65 degrees is not all that hot, but when there is no shade, no wind and you’re just standing there, you might as well be on the surface of the sun. The only good thing that came out of the entire fiasco was that I lost a pound and a half. I also got a chance to help out a friend who really needed somebody to be his friend in a world where it seemed like everyone else was screwing him over.
That is what prompted the random barbecues, the staying out till all hours in the middle of the work week and even going down to the Baltimore Harbour just for a few laughs. Sometimes you have to do things for people because they really need it. For a few days, I did not mind having my private sanctuary invaded by the masses. Although I did do a deep spring cleaning the week after.
Now it’s warm again, I have been partying a lot, but I’ve noticed that my favourite hangout spot has changed dramatically. I think it’s time for me to find a new haunting ground. I’ve gone out to Midnight three times this month and all three times, I just didn’t have a good time. One time I did because I brought my friends with me and they made up for the lack of entertainment in the club, but the other two times… I have no idea what is going on.
Because Midnight allows 18 and up, it is quickly becoming a teen hang out. I noticed that most of the patrons were under 21. You can tell because the big black X is so prominent on the backs of their hands. Normally, I wouldn’t be bothered by this, but there are so many of them and they don’t dance, or do anything of use, but slink around in the corner sucking each other’s faces and clog up the back hallway. Occasionally, they pop out onto the dance floor, so they can rave dance in a circle, and it’s all incredibly annoying. I think I’m just getting old. Hahah. I still like to party but the way in which I like to party is changing.
The demographics have also changed. The club has become black gay night. This is not a gay-bash, so let’s not even go that route, but most of the new faces are young black lesbians. They come in groups with bad hair and worse clothing. Just because you’re gay doesn’t mean you have to look like that. Please take a shower and do something about that head. It’s like the furries disappeared and Aqua Teen Hunger Force took over. I think I might start going down to Spellbound at Recessions instead, where only 21+ is allowed. That doesn’t guarantee the crowd will be more mature, but it’s a start.
And then I met this random guy who offered to buy me a drink. Naturally, I refused because I don’t really drink alcohol and then he offered to buy me something non-alcoholic. I actually did not want anything and he said, “It’s no strings attached. You don’t even have to talk to me.” That was kind of sad. Gone are the days when a girl could accept a drink from a guy and have a nice chat. I feel sorry for people everywhere. This world has become so criminally insane that normal people cannot trust other normal people because we can’t make a determination if they’re normal or not.
He was just some guy, sitting in a club, looking a little lonely. Had this been the 1950s or something, I would have easily accepted a non-alcoholic beverage, chatted the guy up for a minute or two and then went on my merry way. Nowadays, a person has to consider all sorts of things. “Who is this guy and why does he want to buy me a drink?” “Is he a lunatic? Is he trying to slip me the date rape drug?” “Why is he sitting there by himself like that, he’s probably a serial killer.” And really he is just some guy who wants to buy a nice girl a drink and that’s it. Unfortunately, as a single girl in the world, I just can’t take that chance. Hell, not even being a single girl, just being a person because there are so many lunatics and weirdos out there, it takes too long to separate them from the good ones. Most of us don’t even waste our time anymore, so we chalk everybody up to being a psycho.
If I had been thinking properly, I should have Maced him in the face just for even asking. “Don’t you know it’s a war out there? Trust no one!” But I remember that I am out of Mace because I used it on a guy at the ATM one night, a guy who just wanted to holla at me. Or so he said. He was probably the Beltway Sniper’s second cousin or something.
That’s just sad.
So, anyway, last night, the last night in March, I had trouble sleeping. I ran almost six miles earlier in the day and my body was physically exhausted. I poked around on the internet for a little while, then watched this movie Across the Universe, which is now in my top ten list of favourite movies, and I felt for sure that I was sleepy enough to get in bed. Instead, I tossed and turn the entire night, thinking about something that isn’t really all that important. It’s funny how little things get to you. I realise that I am still letting certain situations control me. No matter how far we come in life, there’s always something there to remind you.
It really is time to close the book on certain things.