Today is Friday, June 18. It is the 169th day of the year with 196 days to go.
In 1812, the United States declared war against Britain.
In 1815, Napoleon Bonaparte met his Waterloo, as British and Prussian troops defeated the French in Belgium.
In 1983, Sally Ride became the first American woman in space.
Just Doing My Part
An American citizen, not associated with any government or military, was detained near the Pakistani border after he claimed that he was looking for Osama bin Laden. The man had a pistol, a sword, night vision goggles and Christian religious books. He was trying to cross into Afghanistan when he was stopped. He told authorities that he’d been to the area several times since 9/11 looking for Osama bin Laden and that he had no intention of trying to kill him.
Yeah, okay, he wasn’t really trying to kill him. There is a reward for $50 million for the one who turns Osama ben Laden in, dead or alive. If I had any sense I’d be out there looking for him too.
The Biggest Gainer
A New Jersey woman has decided that she doesn’t want to be the Biggest Loser, but the Biggest Gainer. She is attempting to eat her way to 1000lbs. Currently, the 42 year old woman weighs more than 600 pounds. You can visit supersizedbombshells.com where she models as a super plus sized model. Also on the website are videos of her eating greasy food and attempting to walk to her car. The woman, who wears XXXXXL size clothing, says she loves the attention and wants to be a spokeswoman for big women everywhere. She wants them to know that size doesn’t matter and that they can lead a happy life. She currently has two children and will be getting married next year in Hawaii. She says she is very healthy and doesn’t believe that her weight will cause medical problems, even though she does have Type 2 diabetes. Her fiancé says he finds her very sexy.
I’m all for healthy self-esteem no matter what size you are. Some people equate being thin with being happy and beautiful, and that’s not always the case. Some also equate being thin with being healthy, and that ain’t necessarily true either. No matter what size you are, you need to feel good about yourself and try to be the healthiest you can. Being 1000 pounds is not healthy and I don’t give a damn what this woman says. She is not happy; that is why she wants the attention. She figures being a little bit fat isn’t that special so she’ll just be a whole lotta fat and maybe someone will love her. Her lame excuse that her heart is just fine pales to the fact that she can barely walk two steps away from her couch. She can’t even go outside and play with her kids but she wants to be a spokesperson for fat women everywhere. Okay. You’re going about it the wrong way. You’ll get plenty of attention when they have to forklift your dead carcass over to a landfill to bury you when you die of obesity-related diseases.
Your Own Thief
A Georgia man has been arrested after he was found driving the car he claimed someone had stolen. The man called police to say the motel room he was staying in had been broken into and his keys stolen. He said that his 2001 Acura Integra had been stolen. Police put out an APB for the car and soon discovered the car being driven in another part of town. When they pulled over the driver of the car, they discovered that the thief was actually the man who owned the car. Police discovered that he was under the influence of alcohol and arrested him. The man claimed the reason he reported the car stolen was because a friend had borrowed the car and failed to return it.
See why shouldn’t drink and drive? You just end up looking like an asshole, and there’s really no hope for you.
Crazy For Cakesters
Florida police are searching for a man who broke into a dollar store and stole nothing but a box of Oreo cakesters. A surveillance video shows a man breaking through a glass door and then rummaging around in the store. A few minutes later, the man leaves with the box of Oreo Cakesters, valued at $2.50. No other items were reported missing.
I’ve had cakesters and they aren’t that great to be busting up in to a dollar store. Is it that serious that this guy didn’t have $2.99 or however much it costs to go to the store and buy some? Or maybe he did have the money and the store was just closed and now he’s having some kind of withdrawal and that’s what made him bust the store open. Where do they get these people?
Don’t Feed the Bums
San Diego store owners have put signs in their storefront windows saying, “Don’t Feed the Bums.” It’s a little joke from the National Park Service slogan “Don’t feed the bears.” San Diego shop owners on the beach say that the “bums” hanging around are damaging their businesses and harassing customers. “Don’t Feed the Bums” isn’t meant for that typical bum you think of, the Vietnam vet suffering from Agent Orange, but a new generation of bums: young, aggressive panhandlers who don’t want to work and would rather just beg for money instead. One such bum said, “Everything I’ve ever had in the material world failed me miserably. Honestly, I’ve never been happier.” Police say most of the new bums are young adults with cell phones, coming from wealthy families. There have also been reports of violence against those who did not give the bums money.
This is precisely why I do not give money to any one at all. I can never tell if someone is truly in need of my help or if they are just bullshitting me. I saw on Dateline a few years ago, this woman was recording her child’s birthday party and just so happened to capture one of these so-called bums on tape. This fool stood outside all day long begging for change and then went around the corner and hopped in an Escalade. The woman submitted the tape to Dateline and they tracked the man down using his license plate number. He lived in a very wealthy suburb in Orange County, California. He owned three cars and had a gigantic pool in the back yard. They interviewed him and his wife, who was sitting there in her Tiffany and Prada, and the man said, “If people are going to give me the money, why shouldn’t I take it?” He said he gets enough to pay the note on his truck and the Mercedes his daughter drives at college. After I saw that, I never gave a brown penny to anybody ever again. There are real people who do need help but you can help in other ways. When I see bums, I give them food. This is a good indication if they really need it or not. If they accept the food and eat it, they are grateful and need your help. If they get pissed and start cussing at you, yeah, they don’t need shit but a job and a life.
The way of a superior man is three-fold; virtuous, he is free from anxieties; wise, he is free from perplexities; bold, he is free from fear. –Confucius