Misadventures of the Village Idiot #51

Another weekend gone by that’s just not quite long enough.  I have the option of switching my work hours to 10 hour days so I can have three days off, but I don’t know about all that.

I really had good intentions of going to the Bound party Friday but I managed to get distracted.  I got off work at 1PM but was too lazy to go to the Amish market like I normally do.  Instead I came home and laid on my couch for three hours, watching rerun episodes of Futurama.  When I got up to get dressed, I received a mysterious phone call from someone in Florida.  Normally, I do not answer phone calls with numbers not programmed in my address book, but since it was from Florida I could only figure it was the Kid trying to get in touch with me.

It turned out to be my cousin Josh whom I have not spoken to since Obama first came into office.  I had sent him on a mission to find out some crucial information for me and he finally got back to me.  I had wondered what happened to him but his life is always topsy-turvy and there’s no knowing what he’d gotten himself into.  Anyway, we ended up trading family dirt for two hours, talking about my grandmother and other stuff before I got off the phone with him.  It was almost 11 and I just wasn’t in the mood to get all goth-ed up to go to this party.  So I got back on my couch and watched Lupin III.

Unfortunately, Saturday, September 11, saw me headed to a mandatory family fun day with the unit.  I took myself on an hour walk/run around the neighbourhood before I made myself a large breakfast.  I knew they would have nothing I’d be interested in eating at the family fun thing and I didn’t want to sit there starving for however long they would make us stay there.  I wanted to go to New York like I normally do for September 11, but I guess that just wasn’t in the cards this time.

I hate family fun things because I don’t have a family and even if I did have my family here I wouldn’t invite them because they aren’t the type of people who would be interested in something like this.  My mom doesn’t eat food from other people.  My father would rather be on the moon.  My brother wouldn’t even be home enough for me to invite him.  My sister might come but only because Alien Baby could run around on the playground.

It’s not like I don’t like spending time with my military friends, but I just saw them not even two weeks ago.  We haven’t been out of each other’s faces long enough for us to miss each other.  These family fun things are usually the older soldiers with their husbands and wives, and the younger soldiers sitting around looking sullen, wondering when we could leave.  Which is precisely what happened.  The only consolation is that it wasn’t 100 degrees outside and there was chocolate cake.

We played cards, and just so you know m-Wade can never be my partner again.  I am not really a sore loser when it comes to games.  Naturally, I am competitive and I want to win, but if I don’t, it doesn’t really faze me because nothing in life is that serious to me, but when you don’t even put in an effort… ugh.  m-Wade was clearly on another planet the entire time.  Then when he cut me which made us lose the book and therefore get set at the end of the game, I was like… yeah, looks like we need a new Timmy.  Thankfully it was time for the soup line.

The food was passable.  They did keep us vegetarians and special dietary needs people in mind this time.  I certainly appreciate that.  But everything was cold.  Why did they buy those things if they weren’t going to put them on the heaters?  I don’t know either.

I mingled around for a little while, meeting all the new soldiers in our unit.  I played a round of spades with Lunkhead, SSG Short Bus and a new sergeant from Louisiana.  That was a serious game of spades.  Too bad we didn’t get to finish it, but they finally released us and I was home before most people could get into their cars.

I took a nap for the rest of the afternoon, then got up and went to the club.  I felt like I hadn’t been dancing the whole summer, and to be quite honest, I think I haven’t been dancing the entire summer.  It just felt so good to be in my element, surrounded by like minded folks who don’t really care one way or another what I look like, what I’m thinking or how I live my life.  Nobody cares and that’s the best way to be.

I’m only slightly bitter because I feel like certain people in my life unnecessarily judge me.  News flash:  I don’t think your life is that great.  In fact, it looks materialistic and pointless, but I don’t give a damn because I don’t go home with you at night and when I lay me down to sleep you are not the last thing I think about before closing my eyes.  I don’t really need you to co-sign anything or make any comments or even think about what I’m doing with my life.  I’m grown.  You are too.  Act that way.

Anyway, I stayed out all night long because I didn’t want the night to end.  I got home and stayed up to watch some more Futurama. It was like 5AM before I went to sleep.

So why at 7:58AM someone calls me?  I always turn my phone on vibrate.  I am not a person who sleeps next to the phone so I can get every text message, every missed call all night long.  I know some people are like, “What about emergencies?”  Truthfully, if an emergency were to happen what could you do at 3 in the morning?  Most likely, you’re going to have to wait for the sun to come up to get anything done, so I just turn my phone on vibrate and check it the first thing when I wake up.

The problem is that I accidentally left the phone sitting on the counter.  Usually I put it on my vibrate and stick it back in my purse.  I am an extremely light sleeper so I heard the phone vibrating across the counter.  They kept calling and calling.  And I was like, what the fuck do you want!!!!  It was a number I didn’t recognise but they left a voice mail.  It was the Kid.  Seriously?  When I get woken up I can’t go back to sleep, so I got up, got dressed and went for a five mile dash around the block.  I practised my 2 mile run time.  I’m coming in at like 19 minutes.  I’d like to shave that down but it’s passing so I don’t know if I feel like putting in the extra effort seeing as how I don’t think I’ll get promoted before Michaelmas.

I made breakfast, did laundry and laid out on the couch to watch Elizabeth.  I called the Kid back, went shopping for some new shoes.  It seems like all my shoes are wearing out at the same time.  I hate shopping.  *sighs*

I spent the rest of the evening vegging on the couch with True Blood.  I swear, this show is so damn good.  Every time I finish a disc, I have to wait three days for the next one and it’s agony.  I’m almost finished with season 2.  Hopefully Netflix will pick up season 3 very quickly since it just ended on HBO…Showtime, whatever channel it comes on.

I was having such good sleep Sunday night that I purposely lounged in bed until 10AM Monday morning.  I went for a jog and then decided to go to work at noon.

Cuz I got it like that.


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