It is going to be a brutal two weeks, I am telling you that right now. I’m just not up for the antics; however, even though I say that I am determined to make it out of here alive. I am not one for shaming myself or those I represent (even though that is not usually reciprocated). I would never want to go back and say that I failed at anything. That is just too embarrassing. Even though this is lower than the ninth ring of hell, it’s geared towards the average third grader, making it virtually impossible to fail out unless I purposely try at it. That’s not me. I went into that classroom today with my game face on. I am a motivated maniac.
It’s just like faking an orgasm. I’m so good at it you can’t even tell.
On a more serious note, it really is not that bad. Don’t get me wrong, I would pay anything to get the hell out of here. My feet hurt like hell and I swear Betty gained 10 pounds when she was in lock up. When we were Up There, I don’t recall my shoulders hurting from having to carry her old ass around all day. I feel like by the time I get out of here I am going to have shoulders like a linebacker. It also doesn’t help that no one else seems to want to be here either. You think I am unmotivated and depressed, these people are borderline suicidal. Almost everyone has a “I don’t give a shit” attitude. I don’t want that to start infecting everything otherwise our laid back instructors might crack down on us.
The classroom training is surprisingly useful and interesting. The two instructors have a wealth of experience between them. I think one of them has deployed like three times. I begrudgingly admit that I have actually learned something in the two days I’ve been here, but then again, school-type learning is my strong suit and I never really shy away from any kind of study. Actually one of the lessons learned didn’t come from the classroom. I might be a little black raincloud, but never let it be said that I can’t actually learn and grow from my mistakes. The jury is still out on the practical exercise portion of this class, however. I am just not up for all that running around and carrying on; thank God it isn’t hot yet. Whoever put me on this list to go first, thank you so much. It’s the little things.
Right now I am exhausted from the follicles of my hair all the way down to the end of my toenails. I had to stop and take a few minutes to put this down for memory. I’m okay, today, this second day of class. Check back with me in a few days and let’s see if I can keep this spirit up.