Operation: WTF (Day 178)

Daily Indoctrination

Try saying it while you sleep, "No one is more professional than I...."

It does not matter, whatever Army school you go to, there seems to be some kind of creed to go along with it.  Some kind of mantra that you have to memorise in order to be a go.  They drill it in your head from day one.  Sometimes they even have you saying it three times a day.

They got us out here at first formation reciting the NCO Creed TWICE, then the Soldier’s Creed followed by the Army Song.  Then recite all three again after breakfast, after lunch, after dinner and before we go home at the end of the day.  The said thing is that even after all this recitation I still do not have it memorised, and it isn’t for lack of trying.  I keep a copy of it on me and there is one posted on my wall locker next to my bed.  My battle buddy has quizzed me several times.  Everywhere people are reciting it to themselves.  I thought the guy next to me was talking to himself but really he was trying to practise the Creed.

While you brush your teeth, "I am a non-commissioned officer, a leader of soldiers..."

I just can’t get it.  First, I find it to be unnecessarily wordy.  Do I need to say non-commissioned officer twelves times in three paragraphs?  It’s an editor’s nightmare.  I’m working on it so I don’t look like an asshole in front of God and country.  Everyone will be talking about me if I get up there and can’t recite it properly.

While standing in line, "Competence is my watch word...."

Other than that, there’s really not much else going on.  All the classroom stuff is done.  The only thing left is the Running Around Playing Army test, which I am totally not looking forward to.  It was never meant for me to be an infantryman.  Yes, I know every soldier is an infantryman but let’s be realistic.  If I have to kick in somebody’s door then that means we’re in a very bad way and we should all prepare for a New World Order.

Hey, guys, let's get the hell outta here. The chow hall's this way!

I was informed by one of my classmates that I do not look natural trying to do infantry shit.  That is what I’ve been trying to tell people for quite some time.  You know what the response is?  “You never know when you might have to do this stuff.”  Along with all these creeds, this statement is one of those brainwashing mantras they use to get you to do stuff.  Sam is way smarter than that.  He knows it and he knows you know it.  He just doesn’t want you to question it.  The way I see it, if Sam wanted the S1 shop to kick in doors and conduct foot patrols he would not have bothered to differentiate between combat and support elements.  If the support elements are out there doing some G.I. Joe type shit then that means the combat elements have been wiped out and we’re all fucked.  It’s not to say that I shouldn’t know how to shoot or apply a tourniquet.  Those skills would be necessary if I happen to be travelling in a convoy to another location and the convoy was attacked.  Sam should teach me how to be better at that.  Why Sam has me doing squad drills, I don’t know.  My entire squad is comprised of male and female cooks, admin assistants, truck drivers and artillery guys who can’t imagine these scenarios we are being put through.  Our solution to the method was to have the truck drivers drive the artillery guys out to the location, blow up the bad guys and have the admin assistants write a memorandum about it while the cooks get dinner ready and I get the brief ready.  That sounds very reasonable to me but Sam has other ideas.

It is going to be a very long last three days.


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