Totally Random #16

We have three desk calendars at work dedicated to trivia.  We have a Jeopardy! calendar, a general trivia calendar and a calendar that gives you clues and you have to guess what the answer is based off the clues.  It has become a big thing in the office and we look forward to it everyday.

So today’s question on the general trivia calendar was:

What was the second half of Moses’ demand to Pharaoh, “let my people go.”

None of us even know there was a second half of the command.  We all started guessing.  My boss said it might have something to do with the plagues.  One co-worker said it was probably a statement about the wrath of God.

This guy in the office next to us sometimes participates in the trivia if he is around.  He is a very quiet guy.  He stood up and said asked me to repeat the question.  I did.  He thought about it a moment, and I really thought he was about to say something serious and then he said,

Let my people go, MOTHER FUCKER!

Everybody busted out laughing.  Yes, we know it is blasphemous.  Sure, but it was HILARIOUS because it was unexpected and he is not really the type of guy to say something like that.

Anyway, I thought it was funny and I guess it’s one of those things you had to have been there.

For the record, the correct answer is:

Let my people go, that they may serve me in the wilderness

Exodus 7:16

Totally Random #11

I just read on CNN that Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon are expecting a baby.  I don’t know whether to laugh, cry or throw up.  It’s not that I’m against older women marrying younger men, or older men marrying younger men, it’s just that they seem very gross together.  While Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher seem to go well together like bread and butter, Nick Cannon and Mariah Carey are like ketchup and jelly.

This is a disaster of epic proportions.

Totally Random #10

So, there had been this disgusting rotten smell in my house for the past three days that was driving me crazy.  I could not figure out what it was.  I took out the trash.  I cleaned the drain in the sink.  I cleaned out the refrigerator and threw away any old food.  I mopped.  I cleaned the bathroom.  I burned incense.  I did everything I could to get rid of that smell.  It smelled like old trash, but since I had taken the trash out, I just couldn’t figure it out.

Last night, I finally discovered the source of the smell.  Two oranges had fallen behind the refrigerator and had gone bad.  You know, the smell was strongest by the refrigerator and I thought it was something in the refrigerator.  I don’t usually keep food past its prime, but you know, sometimes things leave behind an odour.  So I cleaned the fridge, top to bottom with bleach and baking soda but still the smell lingered.

Damn oranges.  I did wonder what happened to the oranges.  I keep them in a fruit bowl on top of the fridge.  Somehow they must have rolled away.  I was planning on eating them things too.

Oh well.

But the smell is gone.  Thank God.

Crap the Kid Says #8

So, the Kid’s dad just called and said he got him a Blackberry for his birthday.  The Kid is very excited because he wants us to text each other all day long.  I told him why doesn’t he ask his dad to send the phone up here so he can text his friends.  He said he didn’t have any his friends’ phone numbers.  I said, “Why don’t you text your brother or your mom?”

According to the Kid, ”

Old people should not text.”

Old people?  Who is old?  Apparently his mom.  “My mom be texting all the time,” he said.  I said to him, “I text.”  He bust out laughing.  He has seen me text.  I spend an awful lot of time on Facebook and Twitter on my iPhone.  Sad, but true.  While he’s laughing, I’m wondering if he’s laughing at me because I’m “too old to text” or if it’s just sad that I text.  I have no idea.  Then he turns around and says, ”

But you don’t really look old.  Since you look like you’re 20, then it’s okay.  And plus you don’t have any kids.”

So, in order to be allowed to text, you have to look young or be young, and you can’t have any kids.

Sorry, guys.